Skip to main content

Ode to a Keke Marwa/Napep

I have a love-hate relationship with tricycles. Also called kekes, I am yet to make up my mind as to how I feel about those things. They appear to be safer and more comfortable than bikes (okadas) but they are not anywhere near cars.

After several experiments, I still cannot decide, is the backseat more comfortable than the half-seat by the driver in front? First, one would think the back is more comfortable till you have to sit between two people blessed with an ample size. Even when your seat partners are moderately sized, the shifting and dressing you have to do when one person has to get down is mighty uncomfortable. Particularly because, unlike in a car, you can not pick a safe corner by the door (or opening, since there are no windows). While you are busy getting comfortable, somebody will hop in beside you, suddenly commanding you to dress. The keke opens both ways so you cannot complain.

At such times, the front appears to be better. At least, you will maintain the same position all through the ride and you can safely put your carrier bag down, between your legs. All you need to do is find something to hold tight, the keke can swerve this way or that anytime, without prior notice.The down side is that your ear is next to noise emanating from the keke's speaker, often installed by the keke driver who is intent on playing the music of his favourite star- Pasuma, Osupa, Osadebe or Dj club mix. You can choose your evil though, just stare intently at the keke's windscreen and body before opting to fold into it. Most of the time, the driver would have announced his affiliation via the sticker on his windscreen or inscription on the back of his 'ride'. If you cannot deal with 'atawewe', simply refuse to enter the branded keke.

Although heat is not a problem you will encounter in the Keke Maruwa, you have no shield from cold or rain when the tides change. Water can splash from the floor to your favourite jeans, take it in good fate. You already know that the keke has no window or door. There is a tactic to this however, on rainy or windy days, sit in the middle. That way, even if the trampoline curtain refuses to protect you from rain strokes, human bodies to your left and your right will.

You must also be aware that keke riders have a pact and greatly enjoy each other's company. If your driver slows down to talk to his colleague in the neighbouring keke even though you are late for an appointment. Refuse to get angry, smile and appreciate the love. You shouldn't also be amazed if your driver attempts to squeeze between two cars, its merely a momentary assumption that what an okada can do, a keke should also do.

Now that I think about it, I don't dislike
kekes, they merely amuse me. That is why I will shut down this system, pack my bag and make my way to find the keke that will take me home.

P.S Can't afford a cab and uninterested in danfo troubles, charter a keke, it is more affordable and almost comfortable. Sit at the owner's corner, if it makes you feel better.



Comments

  1. Nice one Bunmi. Never tired of reading your always wonderful and deep thoughts and observations.

    Expecting the next writeup soon.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Awww, thanks a lot sir. I am mighty encouraged.

    ReplyDelete
  3. great observation and quite hilarious

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A WIFE IS LIKE A CAR!!!

I love Nigerians!   We are the definition of the phrase: ‘your brother’s keeper’. We watch out for others so much it is almost too much.   It could be almost annoying at times, at other times it could be the saving grace in certain situations. For instance, in my quest to get to work this morning, I had to wait a few minutes at car-wash bus-stop for the God-sent who was going to help me to work. As I waited, a young woman driving one of those extremely feminine Beetle cars parked and got out of her car.   She hurriedly opened the bonnet and discovered the car was overheating. Leaving the bonnet open, she went to her car to get a bottle of water. She was about to pour the water into the carburetor   when one of the LAWMA officials   who had already crossed the road to go wherever it is he was going hurriedly crossed back screaming: “madam, no pour the water, no pour the water!”. Shocked, she paused to look. In no time, the man was standing by her and explaining the effect of po

WHAT NO ONE TELLS THE BRIDE

You know how politicians and politically aware people eagerly await a new government’s 100 days in office? Publications highlighting the government’s achievements in the time frame, bearing assurances and fresh promises to silence wailing wailers flood the media. 100 days in office is usually a big deal. Since my husband is so into politics and so not into anniversaries, I decided to ignore our 3 months month-niversary and celebrate 100 days in marriage instead. Well, it didn’t quite work. And that’s perhaps where I should start. There are several things the bride does not hear before she becomes a wife. Many she is outrightly not told, others she is too happy or too busy to understand. Then she gets married and after the long awaited event, her ‘eyes clear’.  Sometimes, the giddy feeling lasts till the honeymoon is over, but when she returns home with her husband, reality hits. Even when the new wife has the most understanding husband and uninterested far-away in-laws

YOU SABI WHO IM BE BEFORE???

Call me weird but I enjoy bus rides. Yes, I do not mean comfortable air conditioned buses that belong to my father, brother, company or whoever you imagine I would know who might have a bus. I mean Danfo buses! Ok, I am certain I would like it more if the seats weren’t as many and it didn’t carry so many people at the same time. It would get even better if the windows actually work and the doors don’t fall off in motion. Yes, it would be really great if we didn’t have to almost lap each other all through the ride and the half naked conductor did not have to hang on the bus just next to you with your nose just around his hair ridden abdomen. Can people just stop sleeping in buses? I mean even if you have to sleep, can you do it with some finesse, I don’t even know your name so why should I want your head on my shoulder or the souvenir of your spittle on my shirt? Then, can you be kind enough to keep your baby in check; it’s just not fair for him or her to cry all through the tr